among the dry leaves and ghosts,
I searched, hoping to find myself,
I looked in the darkest pits, searched through my lost memories,
I fought with the world and bore its blows
In the midst of the fighting I won,
I found most of me but then got lost,
Staggering through the thick lies I listened only to my friend,
The rough ground found my knees but never for long.
Now I’m back home,
cleaning up my wounds as I try to find the rest of me.
If you are looking for love
you’ve come to the wrong place
not here will you find it
not now will I speak the word
I’ve no intention of losing myself again
love promises then soothes for a while
eventually it will rupture and threaten
break all that was once there
and leave you shattered and scared
never to be the same again
so take your commotion elsewhere
Not here for love
Not here for love
I have no intention of going back
following false promises and sweet deceit
not now for your words
that glisten and taste warm to my ears
take your wares elsewhere
where other young fools would eat
the tainted food you set in front of them
enticing them with its appeal to the eye
and sensual sweet false aroma
Not here for love
it is an unwelcome guest in my heart
that’s already filled with sensation
and cannot allow for love to enter
for it takes up the whole space
and leaves little room for anything else
it even invades the mind and kicks out reason
then since it is restless it moves out and on
leaving behind empty shells
broken shells of head and chest
mind and heart
I hate to be loved
it burdens me and makes me feel
and I don’t like to feel
go find others
welcoming of your love
and would give you theirs
not here for love
I have none of my own to give you
so spare yourself the hurt
get away from me
and run as fast as you can
run away from me and towards love
when you find it let me know
so it can tear me to pieces
Step right up
Step right up
One used heart for sale
Battered and bruised but works like new
Available for a limited lifetime
Beats steady and requires little maintenance
Features include joy, fear and anguish
Love sold separately
One previous owner
Available only in red
One size fits all
Easy assembly instructions
Does not require ironing
Batteries not included
Act now and receive hope absolutely free
Fifty percent off original retail price
Only one available, hurry while life lasts
Should be handled with care, breaks easily
Don’t be fooled by cheap imitations
Step right up
Terms & Conditions Apply
Satisfaction Not Guaranteed.
What just happened?
Where am I?
How did I get here?
Am I even here?
Is it even now?
Is this even me?
I’m not here,
I’m somewhere else.
Someplace that’s not here.
In a time that’s not now.
I can’t see anything but
it’s beautiful beyond compare.
I cannot hear anyone but
their voices tell only the truth.
I feel like I know everything
All that I don’t know doesn’t matter.
I never want to leave this place.
I’m not afraid because nothing can hurt me,
Nothing can kill me.
Nothing can kill me because I will never die.
I will never die because I was never born.
When Time became so did I,
so did you,
so did all of us.
I was there and you were there.
We were all of us.
We were together, now, then and forever.
I feel myself leaving.
I feel myself coming back to here.
Heading back to now.
But I don’t want to.
It’s too cold here.
It’s too wicked now.
Too cruel and heartless.
Why cant everywhere be there not here?
Why cant every time be then not now?
Why cant every moment be this moment?
Why cant this moment be forever?
- Turn the message around
- Turn my letter away
- Find it among the pine trees
- Look through its mysteries
- My heart on their shelf
- My lies in their ears
- Fragments of angry bitterness
- Hope for coming progress
- The voices in the wind
- The colours in the breeze
- Children weeping in the dark
- Presidents sharpening their remarks
- Is lazy with little to do
- Is found when it’s too late
- Ties and seals all it touches
- Breaks thoughts into wishes
- Can discern their tall-tales
- Can find the wayward words
- Is always fighting the oblivious
- Makes my speech always nervous
- To eventually find out what’s true
- To tear down their misdirections
- To accomplish this one deadly feat
- To makes life come before defeat
- Why they come in the dark
- Why I’ll see this till the end
- They’ll want to keep love forbidden
- I’ll find out where the truth is hidden
- I should go back to our home
- I won’t be safe while I’m there
- The sound of blazing fire within
- The spirit of freedom which will win
- To testify and kill the lie
- To keep one step ahead
- But they find me time and again
- But I vow to end blindness’ reign
- Away the moonlight from the sky
- Away the sunlight from the day
- Hope away and the people grieve
- My words to heart and believes
- To call those that were there
- To gather them all together
- To go back where justice is even
- To find something else to believe in
- Of the poison from their lungs
- Of the truth because it hurts
- Taking the gruesome pain away
- But I’ll met with her again one day
It’s not still it’s wrought
It’s not frill it’s sought
It’s not skill it’s taught
It’s not real it’s bought
It’s not thrill it’s fought
It’s not kill it is caught
It’s not nil it is brought
It’s not will it is thought
End of days
There’s a monster inside me
It’s constantly trying to get out
It beats at the walls of my reality
Struggling to break through fantasy
But I manage to keep it inside.
All day and all night however
I wonder what would happen
If I should ever let the monster out
To meet and greet the living
This excites me more than anything.
The curiosity becomes overwhelming
And I reach deep into my psyche
In order to set the monster free
I finally break the chains of sanity
And let it loose upon the world
The monster looks just like me
But its face is twisted with emotion
An emotion I can hardly recognize
Having not seen it for a while
It is the look of absolute terror.
The monster is afraid, afraid of me.
Why? Why does the monster fear me?
I had never considered it before
But then it suddenly dawns on me
That I am the monster and I’m finally free.
Transitional worries crop up without proper invitation with our preparation determined by the fallow intelligence of course sown by starved teachers who before the inevitable truth dawned held broad theories of long held ideologies falling from lies which were hammered through their and our craniums by institutionalized mechanisms designed to forever enslave the minds of the willing populous into a congregation of dead-eyed sheep-like bi-pods struggling to make sense of the world they found wanting once they stumbled out of their mother’s crevices already struggling to catch-up and adore the simple reality required of all conscious beings that tells us – once one is born, they are on their own.